Just about to drift off to sleep, I heard these words from the Spirit of God: “The experience of grief is like entering into a deep, dark cave.” I am familiar with that cave, having experienced grief in a variety of ways during my lifetime. This statement of personal grief is not a comparison, nor is it a competition–it’s simply my own personal reality.

Remembering well what the atmosphere of that cave was [and sometimes still is], I knew that the Spirit of God was not focusing on the damp, darkness of the grief cave. He explained: “Once you find yourself experiencing this grief cave, I want you to use this time to rest, to heal, and then to emerge from this cave with unforgettable, treasured jewels. They are hidden in deep recesses of the cave, so you will need to search them out ~ search Me out! I have many hidden things for you to know tucked in those deep places.” “You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart.” [Jeremiah 29:13]

I recall prior testimonies I’ve unloaded of the atmosphere of the cave ~ okay, let’s honestly call it whining as opposed to mining. How important it was for me at that time to let it be known how deep, how long, how desperately lonely that cave was. In doing so, my listeners would then begin to share about their own grief caves. Though I was and am even more compassionate for those who’ve suffered loss,  I realized that the Lord’s intention was for us to realize gains even in the midst of loss.

With deeper understanding into the mining of this cave experience, I came to understanding the results if I failed to search for His hidden treasures. He had gently but seriously implied, “Go mining for Me;” yet if I failed to do so, I would fall into the common response of hostility because I’m angry for my loss. I would even go down the guilt trail, wondering if I had done all that I could do to prevent the loss or to make the release easier. Then suppressed feelings would be placed under tight control so I could put up the brave front. Coming out of the cave, without the jewels He’d intended for me, I found myself becoming intensely busy ~ running away. All the while, my soul refused to let go of nostalgia.

Okay, enough of the wasteful dirt underneath my fingernails from trying to find my way out of this place. It’s time to mine! The jewels gained from suffering and loss are countless. Tucked inside the sufferings through losses of this life are realities that teach us things we otherwise would never know. The relationship with our Lord can [if we mine for Him] deepen as we embrace what we cannot hold onto while valuing the things that are eternal. Empty hands and empty hearts soon realize the greater treasures. We learn that this life is not all there is. And when we, as believers, leave this life and enter into eternal life, we will see Heaven gloriously arrayed in the precious jewels. Perhaps some of these jewels will seem familiar.

The Spirit of God said to me, “My people are hungry but they are malnourished.” Remembering the scripture, “Blessed are they who hunger…for they shall be fed” [Matthew 5:6], I knew He was faithful to provide all we could need and to satisfy this hunger.

A rich and full banquet has been laid before us to receive through faith in His Word. The banquet is before us, but we must partake. So I listened more closely to His thoughts. He said, “Bibles are carried like lunch sacks, but they don’t eat.” I couldn’t help but remember our children coming home with carefully-prepared, uneaten food items still in their lunch sacks, crushed and crumbled. Lord, is this the way we value Your Word? I’m sure I’ve had uneaten leftovers, ignored, yet they were divinely intended nutrients for my soul.

Then He said, “They wander through the Word like a walk through a supermarket but never purchase.” How many times have I supermarket-selected ‘just those comforting scriptures,’ yet missed the scriptural health-food section–those scriptures I did not underline nor heed.

Okay…if He had not meddled enough! He said, “They drive by fast-food windows, expecting a quick meal, but never taste and chew.” My schedule-packed days leave room for me to squeeze a meal on-the-run. Did I even remember what I swallowed whole while on my way, yes, even to do His work?

The solution is always provided. He said, “My Word carries all the nutrients needful for life, but My people do not still themselves to take it all in. They remain hungry, destitute, overwhelmed, dry, and defeated because they lack the strength and hope My Word brings to their souls.”

“A brief word study is only an appetizer compared to the full meal I have spread before them.” How I love word studies–yet I’m certain I’ve only received a small portion of the context. Banqueting takes time. I remember a few 7-course meals I’ve been privileged to eat. We sat hours at the table as it was designed that we would taste, enjoy, digest, and come away naturally satisfied.

The invitation written in His Word always brings life: “Taste {chew, relish, and re-visit} and know that I am good.” [Psalm 34:8] He’s prepared the perfectly nutritious meal, if we would just chew, meditate, and receive His provision. That’s the only sure way I’m going to personally “know that He is good.”

Heavy minds + heavy hearts = heavy bodies. If we don’t listen to Holy Spirit’s whispers, if we pay little attention to the weights upon our hearts, our bodies will talk to us. Mine specifically talks to me around my neck and shoulders. Tension builds, tightness forms, and eventually headaches will come–particularly if I just get too busy to pay attention.

This time, the tension lasted so long that my right shoulder ‘locked up.’ Scar tissue had formed so that I now am enduring physical therapy to break up those tissues that yell, “You can’t move your arm this way or that!” At least not without extreme pain!

Now, I don’t like my body to tell me what I can and cannot do. So where does the blame lie? With me. In my quiet time with the Lord, I clearly heard, “You are carrying [shouldering] unnecessary burdens!”

Heard that!! So, in seeking His direction, I studied Matthew 11:28-30 where Jesus spoke to those who carried many burdens, yet had not finished their journeys. Considering the load they had, plus the length of time yet to fulfill their mission, He gave the perfect prescription: COME UNTO ME AND REST.

Rest is a time of refreshing and renewal; it’s not accomplished through a drive-by visit with Him. It’s in the soaking in the deep swim of His love. It’s in the realization that I’m safe and secure in Him. It’s where I am permitted to relinquish the weights I’ve allowed to beset me. This is where the cares of this life wash away and, as He declared, His “yoke is easy and His burden is light.”

After sharing this in Sunday’s message, a friend reminded me of Paul’s letter to the Corinthians. He admonished “Be not unequally yoked.” Admittedly, I had applied that primarily to warnings concerning the joining in marriage. New revelation came through this word: be not unequally yoked with cares, concerns, worries, fears, anticipations…but be yoked with the One who promises the load is easy and light. Why? Because He’s walking with me and sharing the bulk of the load.

My shoulder is already loosening up.

If your life was authored in a book, what would be the book’s title?

Okay, that’s a trick question. Truth is, we don’t have adequate scope to determine the title because all the chapters have yet to be written. How many books have we read that held us in suspense as to how the story would unfold? Even halfway through the book, we would imagine how the ending is going to play out only to read on and discover twists and turns in the story.  Conclusions must not be drawn too soon. We may have to wait a little longer to see redemption revealed.

God writes love stories–that is, when He is permitted as Author. Hosea never thought he’d be asked of God to love an adulterous wife. Read on; the story gets better. Ruth could hardly imagine that her deep loyalty to poverty-stricken Naomi and submission to her advice to glean the fields would lead her to the threshing floor where Boaz would express his devotion. Read on; the lineage of Jesus came through her. The enemies of the Cross had no idea that their crucifixion of Jesus would fulfill the redemption of the souls of mankind. Read on; history pivoted that day.

So jumping to conclusions, way before the story’s last chapters are written, can breed despair and hopelessness. Admittedly, as I have read some books, I have stopped after a chapter or two because circumstances written therein didn’t please me. Or, I might have put the book down mid-way and failed to read the remaining chapters. Wonder what I missed.

Not all books are righteous in content; therefore they don’t hold my interest. I do admit that the ones I read about how people have overcome adversity draw my attention. We all love heroes; we vicariously learn from them. In fact, I had rather read about someone else’s adversity than to go through it myself. Truth is, though, my life is being written for others to read–and its pages will hold testimony of adversity…as well as joys.

“Your very lives are a letter that anyone can read just looking at you. Christ Himself wrote it–not with ink but with God’s living Spirit; but carved into human lives–and we publish it.” [2 Corinthians 3:3 Message]

We can easily forget that He is the Author and Finisher of our faith. He only publishes good books. We just need to watch for the unfolding of new chapters and trust the Author as He carves His very nature into us…not with ink but by the Spirit.

Having given Holy Spirit permission to whisper loud enough for me to hear Him, I find He’s quite intrusive. He meddles in very personal areas such as holiness, prayer life, my checkbook, my affections, relationships and my appetites. Since “we are what we eat,” this intense Holy Spirit-MRI inspection is quite sobering.

I’m preparing for my next sermon and it’s entitled: “You Are What You Eat.” Before we even make personal selections in any of the above categories, it’s important that we read what Jesus said: “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, because they will be filled.” [Matthew 5:10]

First of all, ‘blessed’ means something like ‘you are to be envied.’ Physical hunger and thirst are seldom experienced in Western society, so we just have to either travel to a third-world country, watch the sad reports on the news, or look under a few bridges.

The definition of ‘righteousness’ has been so over-simplified that it’s lost its punch. I’ve understated it myself for years: “right standing with God.” Then I’ve quickly moved on as if to subconsciously avoid the conviction of what ‘right standing’ might mean. The simplest way to define it [while avoiding another over-simplification] is: a change from the inside out. Since there’s only one opinion in this life that truly matters, that being our Lord’s, then we must first check in with Him regarding our “insides.”

He commands us to “be holy.” He taught us how to pray. He instructs us in how to use our checkbook. He changes our affections as we learn His ways. He commands us to love one another. And then…we eat what we want to. {Ouch!} My body is as much a testimony as my soul; therefore, I’m honestly quite far from being ‘envied.’

I’m filled alright…but filled with what? He strongly suggests righteousness!

My patriotism runs deep. Some of my favorite memories are singing with my daddy while both of us choked up over America’s patriotic songs. Friday morning assemblies at junior high school were also among my favorite times because we honored our country in pledge and in song, unashamedly.

These songs are deeply impressioned in my soul. During the twelve years I homeschooled our daughter [two years, our son], the homeschool community provided opportunity for both of our children to participate in musical productions about our country. How grateful I am that their allegiance became foundational.

A proud patriot I am!

It saddens me to witness so few people covering their hearts during the Pledge of Allegiance or the singing of the national anthem at most events. Recently, just prior to our grandson’s high school graduation ceremony, I slipped out to the restroom. Timing was not the best [maybe]; as I was entering the ladies’ room hallway, the seniors were lining up to march in. We were held at bay and weren’t permitted to re-enter the arena until after the pledge to the flag [thank God they still allow it!].

I was at the head of a group of approximately 30 people who were waiting to be readmitted. The pledge began, and I placed my hand over my heart. I couldn’t help but carefully notice that I was the only one honoring these moments. Was it because they were out of public sight and not among the larger arena crowd that they felt it unnecessary to participate? As far as I was concerned, the pledge is the pledge, patriotism is patriotism, no matter where you are–even in the crowded shadows of the ladies’ room hallway.

About halfway through the pledge, I noticed a few obviously-convicted people gently slide their hands onto their hearts. I smiled inside. Then we were released to re-enter the arena. Was my timing off, or was it on? Perhaps I was placed right where I was for good reason. Patriotism is of the heart, not location, nor is it just to be noticed.

God, bless America!

Words are containers. They contain the intent of one speaking them–and many spoken words are treasures filled with love. I personally like to collect these treasures. I love the sweet notes written by our children and grandchildren, even the ones scribbled by the youngest one who had yet to practice her letters. The message is still clear.

Our youngest granddaughter Gracie began writing “You are my sunshine” to those she loved as soon as she could shape a few letters or scribble a little picture. Though early on it may have been written somewhat in ‘code form,’ we got the message. It held such endearment that my blog name was chosen from her sweet comment. Then I asked her to draw the picture on the face of my blog when she was just five years old.

My daddy saved every note, every hand-drawn piece of art, every greeting card mailed or given to him and my mother for many years. When our children entered their teen years, he gave them a bound notebook with all of those treasured items encased. Each of our children were deeply and forever touched by the value they both placed on their grandchildrens’ loving remarks–even the ones scribbled.

We have saved many of the cards and letters our children have written to us. An uncle hand-made me a wooden treasure box in which I store the ones that have spoken life to my soul. Inside this treasure box are also birthday love letters and poetry written by my husband. Oh, the power of words! Oh, the endearment of love scribbles.

It is said that we live longer when we live among loving family members and friends who speak life to us. In Mark 4:39, Jesus spoke to the storm and said, “Peace, be still!” Our words can address the storms swirling around the lives of ourselves and others and command peace.  In Matthew 8:13, Jesus spoke to the Centurion regarding his servant, “Go, and it will be done just as you said it would.”  Healing came through His prophetic words; thus, we have His authority to do the same. In John 11:43-44, Jesus spoke to grave-bound Lazarus and restored him to life. Do our words raise people from their darkness…or cause their souls to be buried in despair?

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and Redeemer!”Psalm 19:14 ESV

The divine call of God to us is to be “all in” for Him. Jesus spoke it in simple terms: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength.” No leftovers. No entitlements. No reserved, secretive soul closets.

The Apostle Paul understood this truth. He used the phrase “in Him” or “in Christ” 27 times in his writings to the Ephesians. To Paul, it meant that we can have an intimate, vital union through faith between Christ and ourselves. But that doesn’t come while being partial in our commitment.

The benefit is that I get all of my Lord and He gets all of me. Admittedly, He didn’t get the better deal; however, He sees me through His destined purpose. He sees me in process of becoming the finished work He began. And He loves me while in process.

Paul wrote: “I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” [Philippians 1:4b-6]

The “in you” that He works is when we are “in Him.” It’s not only a positional statement but it’s the fullest degree of empowerment.

“Now unto Him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.” [Ephesians 3:20]

I ask myself: Am I ‘all in’?

Memory of the word ‘fickle’ goes back to my elementary school years…longer than I care to remember. I can’t say that I’ve used the word much at all since then; but the Lord has repeated it to me more than a few times lately.

Most of us give ourselves plentiful grace when it comes to deciding whether or not we are or can be fickle. I know I did. I would have voted that I was reliable and honest. Letting myself ‘off the hook’ positioned me to hear an even clearer word from Him. God is faithful to place our clay right back on the potter’s wheel for air bubble removal. [that is, the hot air of self-approval]

‘Fickle’ means: changing frequently, especially as regards to one’s loyalty, interests, or affection. It’s a lack of steadfastness. Loyalty seems easy enough, until it’s challenged by one with whom we disagree. Interests can change with the wind; there are increasing lures that beckon us off the straight and narrow. Affections can change as quick as a mood. Thus, we find ourselves more fickle than we want to admit.

Admittedly, we can be pretty steadfast in certain areas of life. The Spirit of God was after a serious reveal of what I would have called my ‘secret areas.’ Those thoughts that surface from the hidden places of my heart…the ones I hope go unnoticed. But not to Him!

Then He said, “Distractions can lead to attractions.” Allowing my focus to wander to the left or to the right ~ failing to look first to my Lord ~ I find myself following after distractions. David wrote in Psalm 1:1 that we must be careful that we do not walk, then stand, and then sit among scoffers, whom I’ll take a little liberty to call ‘distractions.’ Once we walk up to them, linger while standing, and then sit down with them, they have thus become attractions.  The result is that we will become what we are attracted to.

‘Fickle’? Yes.  “All we like sheep are prone to wander, every one to his own way.” [Isaiah 53:6]

“Only child” was a term that resulted in insulting remarks spoken to me from classmates. More than a few of those sitting in desks nearby would assume that I was spoiled by allegedly getting everything I wanted, because I was and am an “only child.” For years as a child, I thought there was something wrong with me because I was this strange breed called an “only child.” Add to that the term ‘spoiled,’ and I was perplexed. Was I spoiled? What did that mean? As an adult, I’ve come to understand that we aren’t always what we seem. Everyone has a story–including my mother.

Being the only child born to Joyce and Bill was not my choice; it was the result of the arduous labor my mother endured in birthing me. She had suffered a spinal injury on a diving board at the age of 13. Hospitalized for months, and suffering a deadly infection at the base of her spine, she nearly died. This left her unable to deliver me naturally after she married my daddy many years later. After 36 hours of intense labor, she yielded to a Cesarean section. Doctors advised her to never have any more children.

No doubt I was loved as the only child they would ever have; yet I admit it placed within me a dream of a large family when I became an adult. Four children and nine grandchildren became the treasures that God loaned to me and my husband.

The “only child” position has created in me a longing for brothers and sisters. It’s no wonder I love the corporate body of the church–especially ours [though a bit prejudiced]. What I was unable to have as a child in my natural family God generously gave to me in my spiritual family. Today that family extends way beyond the walls of our church body. I have spiritual sisters and brothers, spiritual aunts and uncles, and spiritual children of all ages–some even from other countries. Each one is a treasure to my heart. What was considered a small, childhood family unit of three has been multiplied to scores of spiritual family members.

This plan God had for me as a child left me with a love for His Body that I cannot explain except to say that each one fills a void that was left in my heart. I hear people complain about their siblings and then wonder…would I have felt the same way? I measure what my response would be by the way I love each member of our natural family, each member of our pastoral flock, and the extended spiritual family members beyond.  I believe I would do all I could to build a bridge of reconciliation. We need each other.